quite a number of things happen the previous month.

major de~~ only er jie's wedding.~ there the family photo taken.
look as if happy.. the fact is t i dun feel like i'm part of them.


anyway i dun care. i always wonder. y other ppl's siblings r so much caring n loving.
whereas mine? is like shit.
haiz. like wat san jie say~ all attitude like shit.
perhaps ba~ not even close at all.
only san jie n me. coz we r tgt since small.

mum's pearl all gt married liao.
she ofcoz happy la.
the only thing unhappy is coz i'm still in the family.
i'm like the extra 1 in the family. none of them love me.
i mean srsly~ not tt i wanna think this way, but it how they make me feel.
i dunno how to love... coz i dun have love...
i dun deserve 1?
mayb...
idk...
i always envy on other ppl's family~
seeing them wif laughter n happiness etc...
things i always craving for.. but i would nv have it.
pathetic isnt it?
a ger who long for love from her parents which r impossible.
wat can i say man.
resign to fate.
nth else?
i wanna move out.
n not living in a place without dignity.
if i have a choice...
only if i have a choice.
nth gd will fall on me srsly.
fate might gimme something sweet or nice..
aft awhile it will take everything back.
making me lost n confused.
therefore, i nv wish/hope things.
nv pin high hope on it.
this is my life.
a cheap n loveless life.